D3 body, D1 cock
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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