dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize