I didn't shave. On purpose
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
