i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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