census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
