My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Randomize