he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
vagina is talking i cant
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
