All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize