so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
How does it feel to date your dad?
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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