Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
