drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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