but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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