So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
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