Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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