Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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