Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
4 words: hood of his car
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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