Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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