Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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