nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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