i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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