"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
You dont lie about slip and slides
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Randomize
