I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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