get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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