why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
