What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize