Cold hands, warm shart.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Randomize
