Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize