Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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