Im at strip club and am horny
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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