You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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