The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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