Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
