U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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