There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
