Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
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So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
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