Your tits are I can't wait for
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
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i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
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Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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