yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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