I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I am spending my child support on dildos
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
