Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Randomize
