Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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