Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
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