She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
