Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Will exercising make me less horny?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
