got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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