Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
