put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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