they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
