I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
