Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
