Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize