Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I have post one night stand depression
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
