hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
