I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize